Wednesday, October 31, 2012


I decided to clean some of the photos off of my phone.  

Some of the Halloween candy we gave out
My son the day he made the basketball team, he was super excited.

My badass blinky light so I can run at night

My nighttime running attire, haha

I ♥ My compression sleeves

I took this photo of myself after I ran my first 13.1 ever while training

Some of the gals at my work having fun with the BLITZ :)

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Homophobic people suck!

I over heard people at work complaining about a soap opera showing two gay men express their affection.  They were saying that they had to change the station and couldn't believe that the soap opera would show such filth.

The only thing I found disgusting was that conversation.

Hurricane Sandy

I sat here safe and sound in my home while I watched on the television a horrific storm demolish most of the east coast.  I later sat and watched the videos and photographs of the damage she made.   I don't think I have ever seen that much devastation in our country all in one event.  One perfect storm.  I pray for all those affected.  It truly is heartbreaking to sit here so helpless when people are struggling so much.

Saturday, October 27, 2012


My daughter has been in Robotics this year. She is part of the creative design and helps out where needed.  She spends 2-3 evenings a week and several Saturdays with these people and I haven't fully understood what the crap it is all about until today.  Yes, Today they had a competition and it was the first one I have ever been to.... it was AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!  They were people dressed up from martians to hula girls and everyone so excited and screaming for their robots.  I went to view their booth and this is where Destiny did most of her work and it was AMAZING!  I was thrilled to see her participating in this and look forward to other competitions that they may have! :)

Happy Ending!

This year has been amazing for me as far as what all has happened to me.

- I started this year off on a weight loss journey that caused me to lose 25 lbs.
- I ran my first race ever (2 miles)
- I ran my first 5K
- I ran several more 5Ks (a total of 8)
- I had my first running injury, a bad fall that set me back a bit and got me off track with my weight loss, I actually gained back 10  lbs of the weight I lost.
- I was in my first multi-sport (Duathlon)
- I did my first Triathlon
- I started a new job!
- I did my second Triathlon
- I did my second Duathlon
- I am getting back on track with my weight loss now with a new goal set for the end of year.
- I am going to be doing my first Half Marathon in 13 days! (WOW just saying that freaks me out!)

And to celebrate such a remarkable year of accomplishments we are going to end this year with a BIG BANG! I am super excited about this too!!!!

When I started this journey in January we were watching the show The Biggest Loser.  We never really watched it before and we watched up to about Season 10 before we stopped watching it, and I mean we were watching it back to back most every night all the way through the seasons and it was enjoyable for me to see the transformations of all these peoples bodies.  So I am not a fan of people losing weight super fast and then gaining it back which this show has been prone to do. I am a fan of people eating right, exercising and making a lifestyle change that will forever keep them happy and healthy. Well, I said of that to say that part of the big ban has to do with the beginning of the years fascination with the Biggest Loser. Now, for the BIG BANG News!

I will be participating in another Half Marathon.  Not just any Half Marathon though.  It is The Biggest Loser Half Marathon in Panama City Beach!!!! I am so super excited!  I feel this year has been a change for the better in my life. I am not where I want to be goal wise but I am getting there one step at a time and I will meet my goal before long.  I am becoming stronger and healthier.  The year of 2012 will forever be the year that has changed my life.  

Added perks of going to do this major run is that I will get to do it with my man by my side as he has been this entire year giving me wonderful support and encouragement.  We will get to do in one of most favorite places and we get to do at the end of the year which means we will be ringing in the new year at the beach with the big beach ball drop.  It is going to be a wonderful time!

I have already registered for the race and we already have the room booked.  I have a few worries about going like I will be training for a half marathon during the winter and around the holidays when it comes to eating and cold weather this will be trying and we have the holidays which will hit our extra spending pretty hard so this will be a little complicated to pull off, but I feel it is going to be totally worth it! :)  Once it is over and we are relaxing in our room the party will begin and not end until the drive back home, Celebrating a wonderful year and getting ready for an even more amazing one next year! :)

I told you a BIG BANG!!!


So we watched a couple of scary movies last night.

The first was Kidnapped and it was a very good flick.  The title doesn't fit the film and it is dubbed as it is originally like a spanish  movie, but pretty violent and intense movie and I recommend it if for no other reason than a couple of the killings are so brutally extreme you just have to watch it.

The second movie was Insidious, which my family says I have seen already but for some reason I don't recall it.  There were a few parts near the end that I remembered faintly.  I either was busy doing something else while we watched it or I erased it from my memory as it was so terrifying.  I literally experienced every emotion during this film.   I screamed a few times loudly and during some of those times I got chills down my entire body.  One time when I was busy screaming during a terrifying part my maltese dog decided he didn't appreciate my blood hurdling scream and jumped up and bit my hand. Not bad, didn't break the skin but was hard enough to cause a little discomfort.  I freaked out then because I was freaked out from the movie and then freaked out by my dog so lol I was FREAKED OUT!!!! lol It was a fun night with Desmond and Thomas watching some flicks. :)

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

All in how you see it.

Sometimes burdens of life get you down.  Rather it is finances, some relationships, the work you are doing, your health.... whatever it may be there are definitely ups and downs to this life.  I see some folks who constantly complain, its their health or their finances and nothing positive and I just want to say "Do you honestly not have a single thing to be happy about in life?"  I mean I know sometimes when life gives you hell (which it does often) it seems like its the end of your rope, but the truth is, that even those hard times can have a positive spin to them and make you feel better.  It is all in how you look at it.

Another thing is like that unconditional love.  You know the one you have for your children, your partner, your pets even. You love those furry kids even if they poop in the floor or get excited and pee on your house guest (that has only happened once... hmmm could be why we don't have company much).  I know that you love those people/animals that mean the most to you unconditionally you take the good with the bad.  Sometimes as parents we want the best for our children. We want them to learn everything there is to learn about being a respectable adult and everything they need to learn about everything in the world so that they are awesome and we can brag about them... am I right?  The truth is a lot of us parents try to teach to our kids the things we were taught and lessons we have learned the hard way but kids need the opportunities to learn from their own mistakes.  When they make mistakes we can look at it as a time to remind them of their failure or show them compassion and understanding that no one is perfect and we too have made some pretty bad decisions in our lives some of them life altering.  Life is hard, no one is perfect and no one can walk in another shoes exactly. Don't judge, Don't over parent and more importantly always let those you love know you are there for them. You love them unconditionally rather they mess up or not you are there for them. Whatever choice they make, and if they hurt for any reason you will be there for them.

"A word of encouragement during a failure is worth more than an hour of praise after success.” 
~ Unknown Author

"When someone we love is having difficulty and is giving us a bad time, it's better to explore the cause than to criticize the action.” 
~ Zig Ziglar

Remember to think before speaking and pause before punishing or criticizing to look at things from another view point because you are not always right and your way is not the only way. (me)

Never forget the rainbow of colors are better than black and white. (me)

Also, it's how you see it in this election bull crap that is going on.  All of the Facebook friends generally are voting for Romney and it makes me sick all the crap they keep posting about the election.  If you are poor and want to stay that way vote for Romney because he could care less about helping you.  If you feel that Obama has failed you, then just remember that every politician ever will probably do the same.  My vote will be for Obama because I don't believe he has had enough time in office to make changes that he has wanted for our country. I will be honest that Bush has turned my stomach against the republicans even more so than previously and when I hear Romney and listen to what he says I hear Bush.  Cocky, and just simply a speaker who doesn't seem to be a thinker.  I believe he is well rehearsed and I do not trust him, but I can't say I would trust any politician.  But since that liberal guy..... President Obama is watching out for us and with the Obamacare as so many like to call it, and his plan to tax that 1% higher seems to be a fine plan because well if I was in that 1% then I would gladly agree to pay it to help our nation in any way.  So if you haven't noticed my vote will probably cancel out your vote lol because I will be voting for Obama. Again its all in how you see it.  

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Silly and I love it!

I just noticed these two pictures, that they were literally not "posed" for and how they amazingly are silly and standing in the same locations.  lol I love them!!! :)

Yes I know these are the same photo from the previous two posts, but looking at them together just is awesome! I love my family!

New Family Plan

Let's face it, life is busy. I think we are all busier than our parents or their parents. Everything moves faster in this day and age.  Because we are so busy my enjoyment most days is looking forward to sitting, just sitting on the couch and watching some of my favorite TV shows.  The problem is I sit all day at work now, I watched entirely too much TV and my life is just moving too fast despite all the sitting.  You know time goes faster when you are watching tv/movies.  You can accomplish so much in the amount of time you can watch a movie.  I am going to try to make the most of my time and I am devising a new schedule to sort of help me maintain a balanced life with my family.  A typical week with my new plan will look something like this (note: This will be the evenings after work).

Monday: Home to do my exercise, shower/dinner, and do something with Desmond (my son) it may be watching a game on TV, watching a favorite show, playing  a game (as long as he isn't grounded from the playstation), going to see a movie (if I can afford it), going to ice cream ... you get the point, just something that we do together it may be an hour or 3 hours depending on the week.

Tuesday; Home to do my exercise and chores around the house, shower/dinner

Wednesday: Home to do my exercise and do something with Destiny (my daughter) same as with my son, just something that we can enjoy doing together.

Thursday: Home to do my exercise and do something with Thomas (my man) we can have a date night and do something that we enjoy.

Friday & Saturday will be usual days with exercise, chores around the house and so forth, might still have another date night or play night but nothing is going to be set in stone these nights.

Sunday will be a family chore day and a family fun evening. It may just be sitting and watching a movie with popcorn, or it me be going on some sort of adventure, but it will be something that we all 4 do together.

I believe this will help me share the love with everyone and spend time with my kids. They are changing and I am not sure their likes and dislikes as much as I once was. I miss my babies, I miss good quality time with my man and I am hoping this will help us grow closer together.

Bitter or Better

I was thinking on something and the fact is that I am usually a very positive up beat person.  Over the last several years somewhere I have lost me.  I have posted about this before, and still haven't figured it out yet. I think it is because I am surrounded by negative. Some people see a situation that has happened to them and effected them in some way and they feel bitter about it. I am always someone who sees something as a change for me to be better or the others involved to be better but not be so bitter about it.  Live and let live so to speak, just move past things. I tend to linger on them now longer than  I use to and have a bitterness in me when something effects me negatively.  I HATE THIS ABOUT ME!

One good thing is that I am noticing it and only I have the chance to improve this about me.  I can be a positive influence on those in my life. I can be a positive influence on myself.

I hope it rubs off on those around me too, because its hard to be positive and in a good mood when others in my home can be so negative and put an end to a good mood or thought so easily without even thinking of how hard I might have worked on that mood.

I choose to be better!

My ♥ belongs to

These three!  

I fight with each of them, we clash on so many different things sometimes.  I feel I am failing them and sometimes I feel they are failing me.  I post things here on this blog about things that make me happy, angry and sad.... but the most emotion I have for these three people is LOVE! They are my world.  


Here is my little Superman

All you get is a picture of the socks because he refuses to let me take his photos.  I HATE THIS!!! I am going to try to convince him to let me take some soon, so wish me luck with that!   I think the socks are too cute!

Friday, October 19, 2012


I will be wearing purple today, and turning my blog purple for today!  Please show your support!

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Grown up

This is my daughter and she thinks she is ready to tackle the world.  She has in her mind the only thing that matters is getting out of my house.  She doesn't care about school as much as she cares about getting out of my house.  My heart hurts because of this and I think back at what I have done wrong.  She says its because we are so controlling.  She has a bedtime (11:00pm), she has a curfew when she goes out usually (11pm on weekends and 10pm on school nights), she has a limit on her phone that doesn't allow her to text at her bedtime because she has a bad habit of texting until 1 am on school nights if we don't have that rule in place and its not just a rule we have controls on her phone.  We also have controls on her phone because she was texting in school so she can't text during school hours.  Also we have controls on the internet so she can't stay up all night online.  She thinks because she is 17 years old she needs more freedom.  I pay for the phone and the rules in place for her are only there because she has never learned from her mistakes. I have gave her many trials with relaxed texting and she would break the rules, and I know right now if we turned that off she would look me right in the face and say she wouldn't mess up but her grades would drop instantly and I would see text on her phone in the wee early hours of the morning.  

She has a lot on her plate still with this being her Senior year.  She has another ACT to take and studying to do/practice tests.  She has a special thing for All state (Outstanding Choral Student) that she has to be working on her piece.  She has a tough schedule with school work being an IB student.  There is just so much for her to worry about and her focus is solely on getting the hell out of my house.  I do not abuse her. I have rules yes but they hardly do anything to earn the things they do have and I see no reason on earth why she would need to text way late at night on school nights.  I see no reason why she would need to be out later than 11 pm unless special occasions which I am willing to relax that time if she is going to something that doesn't end until later, its not like I make her leave early.  I know its rough being a teenager and I just wish someone would have set some boundaries for me.  That is what I have done for her and she hates me for it, but I am not willing to relax these things.  When she is in college I don't see myself having these sort of rules for her as she will be more responsible for herself at that time, she will paying for her school because I can't afford to meaning what she doesn't get in scholarships or grants she has to get a student loan for and she has to pay it back.  So if she stays up all night and then I guess that is her choice. Guess she thinks I am too harsh on her but she doesn't understand how she doesn't really give me much to go on either.  She never cleans her room unless she wants to go somewhere and then she only does it because that is a rule she can't go out if her room is a disaster.  The only thing the kids have to do is work hard in school and do the best they can do (no zeros on homework), clean up after themselves and keep their room in order, help me feed the animals and pick up the house from time to time, and use their privileges wisely.  

She doesn't even drive.  We need to sell her bug so we can buy her another vehicle. I bought a for sale sign for the bug, I  have asked her to crank it and if it needs jumped off because it hasn't been cranked in awhile to see if Thomas will help her get it jumped off. To wash it and help me sell it.  I bought it for her, it was a mistake but I was buying her what she said she wanted.  I regret buying that car for her, but its done now and we can't get another one until that one is sold.  She wont wash it, hasn't tried to crank it and the for sale signs still sit in her room waiting on her to do something. Why should I do it all? Why should I do everything! She needs her Senior portrait made and I have asked her to call the portrait studio the school is using for the drape picture and schedule an appt since the summer when she was sitting at home all day with nothing better to do, but she still hasn't called to make said appt.  I just reminded her again this week. Its the principle of the matter, she needs to grow up and be more responsible and she should be able to handle some of these things. 

I am so worried about her.  I am not going to let her outrageous comments about how bad it is to live here affect me though. She says no other parents are like me, and I say... I don't care! I am doing what I feel is right and that is all I can do. I am not perfect, there is manual to raising kids and I started way early with her. We have been through alot and knowing that all she cares about is getting as far away from here as she can as quickly as she can and her so rudely displaying her feelings to me just make me shrug my shoulders and say I am trying. I have tried and I will continue to try to be the best me I can be. I am not perfect. I do what say I am going to do. Like if I say I am going to run a half marathon then I am unless of course I am injured or something like that I will do it the best I can. She tells me she is going to and she quits 2 weeks into it. Just quits. Doesn't even want to try anymore. She lost the entry fee too because she had already paid for it. She worked a job and her car was giving her fits and the job is 1.5 miles from the house... that is it. Not only that she has friends and ways she could get a ride if she didn't want to walk because I was at work and couldn't take her to her job, instead of making it happen, finding a way to work she just quit, no notice nothing, just quit. Used the car as an excuse.  She is so immature that I am so terrified for her.  My heart hurts I am loosing my baby girl and she doesn't hesitate to let me know this, when all I have ever done is try to be the best I could be.  I guess I am a complete failure. My son wants to live with his dad and hates me, so he says and my daughter is willing to throw everything away to just get the hell out of my house. I am to the point I am tired of trying. I am so tired of giving and accepting and giving and accepting.  I am so very proud of her and her accomplishments thus far.  She has some weakness as do we all, and I am not trying to point those out here. I am simply trying to express my heartache and disappointment.   I love her, she is my sunshine, and always has been.  I miss her already!


Talk about sore muscles. I have started a new workout, only on day two.  I have really been needing this! I haven't done strength training except for my brief time in boot camp.   I loved how I was feeling when doing the bootcamp but I can't afford it, and now there isn't one close enough if I could afford it for me to drive to every day.  I have to do something realistic to my lifestyle to be able to stick with it.  I have plenty of tools at home to get a great workout in but I don't utilize them.  I have a weighted bar, a step, kettle bells, and hand weight as well as mat.  EVERYTHING I would possibly need.  I have Insanity which is awesome but a bit on the difficult side and probably too advanced for me. I feel like a failure when attempting it because they are so much more advanced and I have to quit before they do or go into cardiac arrest lol.

Oh I mentioned a new workout didn't I?  It's Jillian Michaels Body Revolution and it is wonderful! Not too easy and not too advanced that I can't do the moves (or at least it hasn't been in the two days I have tried it).  I hurt..... I hurt bad! Every muscle I used in that day one is screaming at me today. My shoulders, upper back, stomach, inner thigh... I move in my chair at work and just OUCH!  That is awesome to feel that way. I felt like that a couple of times after boot camp, and even though I am exercising on a regular basis, I do not usually have sore muscles other than my lower legs.  That is it! That is from pure impact.  I also go slower than the snails on the road so no wonder I don't have much muscle pain.  But the pain in the lower leg prohibits much speed work, and working on distance has done nothing but make me slower!  I know that is odd, I associate it with mental issues I am having knowing I have to last for many miles means I must go slower or something.  To work on speed with running and actually get to where I may run a full 5k without a single walk break and hopefully someday get it to 30 minutes... I need to work on my body. The whole body. The fuel for it, the strength of it... all the mechanics need to work and when I started this in January I just saw goals I wanted to reach.  I have reached them and I am very proud of my accomplishments but now I want to get better. Go longer, stronger and faster.  So I am determined that from yesterday until Spring I am going to do at a 30 minute video workout. I figure I burn about 300 calories at my size now doing those, this weekend I plan on wearing my heart rate monitor to get a more accurate calorie burn.  I think with that calorie burn and the dvd plans to work different muscle groups so you can work out every day like Jillian/Insanity and such those will keep me doing a video.  I am going to stick with my training plan for the half marathon and then when that is over, I think I am going to start over with a couch to 5K program and get to wear I am running and entire 5K.   With the circuit training and the running I will be doing that should keep me fit during the winter months alone. I am going to break out the bike trainer and have it set up in next to the treadmill and just jump on and ride some nights when I don't run to keep that going and on some Sundays I plan to hit the pool so I can continue to work on my swimming because it is so far from good its bad and I do plan on doing triathlons next year as well as duathlons.  I am going to be an athlete. Wait I am now, just a wimpy one. lol

Anyway, so far day two of this Jillian workout I recommend it for those who are like me, not a complete couch potato but not as strong as someone who can run a solid 5K. I think this video and my continued perseverance I will just get there. I am 36 now and my goals are to be bad ass by the time I am 40 lol.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Gettin' my Freak Off

I am not going to freak out that my mile pace has slowed down drastically.

I am not going to freak that my legs have knots for the first 3 miles EVERY TIME I RUN.

I am not going to freak that it takes me 2.5 hours to just get 10 miles in and the race that I signed up for in 4 weeks is for 13.1.

I am not going to freak that I have gained 10 lbs of the weight that I had worked so hard to lose somehow this summer (but luckily I am back down 3 lbs hoping to be back down the full 10 by the half marathon).

I am not going to freak that the weather is going to be cold by the time the race gets here and I never once thought about it until a recent cold run.

I am not going to freak that I am now going this alone since Destiny has opted out. And, 13.1 miles alone is hard.

I am not going to freak that I very well may not finish this in under 3 hours.

Not going to freak. Not going to freak.  Why am I not going to freak? Wouldn't you freak? I am not going to freak because I am going to do this.  I am going to finish this event.  It will not be a race for me but none of the events I have signed up for have been to race in them... they have been to prove to myself that I can do it, to give me goals to push for and to finish.  I am a finisher.  I will finish this race! I am not going to freak!

Me and my hair

If you didn't notice in my most recent photos, the red hair had to go.  It was a joke and I need to post this blog to remind myself that I NEVER WANT TO BE RED AGAIN!!!!

I stripped the red out of my hair and tried to go back blonde but it was a strawberry blonde that had blotchy color because of stripping such a dark dark red out of my hair.  I had to wait a few weeks because of the damage I was trying to avoid and then I went back brown close to my natural color.  I hope to let my hair grow back out, and keep the brown color until spring time at which time I am going to get highlights again (professional) lol me and my hair, its like a soap opera.
Dark Red
Stripped color + blonde = Strawberry blonde

Neutral brown (not sure why my phone is taking checkered pictures lol sorry for the poor quality but its the only photo of the brown I have).

Sunday, October 14, 2012


Not sure what it is about my youngin's but they sure do drive me bonkers!  I am proud of them, they aren't in trouble and aren't doing drugs or failing or doing anything wayyyyy wrong.  They just dont DO ANYTHING!!! I mean chores are a joke around my house. One of them is so lazy that their grades show it with big "goose eggs" for homework that is nothing but a sign of laziness.

My daughter paid money and signed up for the half marathon with me that she had plenty of time to train for considering her age and fitness I figured she would run circles around me, but it hasn't been the case and she has already quit trying after only 2 weeks of trying.  Just gave up.  That is not me, she does not get that from me.  I am worried about finishing this thing but I am damn sure going to give it my all so I don't feel like I quit.  

I am just really concerned.  Then I look back at my fun times over the few months and they are not a part of them, is this because I am a selfish mother? I spend money on myself and do things for me only? I don't think so but now my mind is messing with me.  I spend money on ACT tests and football cleats, and well anything they tell me they need.  Desmond just wants to go to his dads, and Destiny just wants to do things with her friends.  Neither of them want to do anything with me.  Why? Because they are teenagers? or because of me?

I love those two bratz more than anything and all I can do is hope for the best for them.  Destiny is already 17 years old.  Hell I had a baby when I was 19, so she thinks she is grown.... I just hope for the best.  Desmond is a good kid but doesn't want to do anything in the form of work.... I just hope for the best.

I love them, I miss them... maybe I need to plan a family fun event here soon...Guess I need to be thinking on it.

BCS Ranks BAMA #1


Friday, October 12, 2012

Girls night

New job is going well, I have found a place that is not stressful at all, and just steady work. Nothing crazy. Just steady work. I love it!!! Some of the girls went to one of my favorite places "The Brick" for drinks and I got invited so I guess I am fitting in at the new place. It was fun, spending time with the outside of work was different and enjoyable! :)


You know your loved and your guy thinks you are pretty special when he surprises you by sending you an email that he has just purchased tickets to see.....

AAAACKKK!!! I am so super duper excited!!!! It is a Saturday night concert too so I forsee a weekend in Nashville! :) I can't wait.   Well it is not until March so I have to wait but lol whew it's going to be hard!  I love having something to look forward to! Now we will be seeing The Who in Nashville in December and Pink in March. YES YES YES!!!

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Mud Bunnies

Some girls from my childhood that I have been in contact through facebook with have decided to start a team for the Dirty Girl that is going to be in B'ham, Al in March.  Of course I signed up! I wanted to do one of the obstacle courses for a long time like the Warrior Dash but I hated to do it alone.  I am very thankful that I am getting to do this with a group of gals who ROCK! Something else to be looking forward to! :)


National Coming Out Day:

Wednesday, October 10, 2012


My poor cat has been in a fight.  She doesn't look to have been the victor.  The side of her neck up to her ear is sliced open pretty deep.  She disappeared for several days then came home with the wound that she had licked pretty clean.  She seems to be fine, other than the gaping whole in her neck.  I worry about her and hope she has a speedy recovery.  Trixie, your still my bad ass and I know you will get revenge! haha

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Happy Birthday to My ♥

Yep this crazy guy here! He has my heart! Happy 45th Birthday... from the wacky hats and crazy shoes to all that you do, I love you!  

For your birthday I got tickets to see (drum roll please.....)

Surprise!  It's not until Dec 2nd so we have something to look forward to! :)

National Honor Society

I am proud of my daughter getting inducted into the National Honor Society.  I can't believe she is a Senior and we are moments away from her graduation.  It literally blows my mind.