I was so proud of my healing time on the broke ass... Today I said to myself "Self? this ole ass is going to be just fine real soon". I actually believed it, until I skated today! ACK!!!!
No seriously today sitting and standing didn't give off the same pain it had been, I noticed I was getting up faster, wasn't taking it as easy as I had been and I was never in real bad pain, just minor discomfort. I was thinking WOOT! Yep, this is going to be back to 100% before long.
Then, I go skating tonight. I was excited to get out there, I skated some on Sunday. I was timid on Sunday but didn't really "hurt" skating. Tonight? My ass is sore again (slow moving now), I skated like it was my first time again (scared of everything!) I skated so bad I went back to my original style of "sticky" skating but with only one foot... you know not able to lift up the other foot off the ground at ALL. UGHHH That made the stronger leg ache because it was working so hard.
I was cramping and miserable for the most part. Never broke a sweat, wasn't a workout and nothing was accomplished at all. I did get to see my Derby wife Gina which was nice and she was encouraging me and trying to help me but I was pretty pathetic tonight.
I will be doing several exercises a day to work on my balance and leg strength. I am not giving up. I will get tougher, I will concur the fear that has been put in place by the broken ass. I fell on it numerous times before I broke it and I know learning to do the things I need to I WILL FALL, its a FACT... the fear comes from WHAT IF I FALL ON MY ASS!!! I know (mentally) to fall forward, but I am new and learning and one slip up on my skates and I land on my ass, that mental image is there the whole time I skate. I skated 3 full weeks before doing the boot camp at 3 days a week, then the first day there hurt myself... so I only gave my all to this skating thing those three weeks. I can't expect more out of myself or my muscles then my body can do. I have to build up strength in the "skating muscles". I have to build up endurance. I have to improve overall, I will not be scrimmage eligible this year, I will accept that. But next year!!!! I will be there! That is the goal I am setting for myself. Its realistic and definitely doable. I will keep going to practice and the girls will push me, and mostly I will push myself and I will get there.
For now, I am just going to use my blog to whine and moan lol I so wanna be a bad ass!!!
Tomorrow is the skate a thon... come out and join in some fun! :) I hope to be skating better than I did tonight lol
On a funny note. We were thinking of derby names.... Thomas said "I know what your name could be.... Broke Ass Mountain" however THAT IS NOT MY NAME! I have more important things to do besides claiming a name like learning to skate! I almost was going to go ahead and claim a name, but then after tonight would be too damn embarrassed to have a derby name and skate the way I was... give it time! :)